Homestuck Re-read Part 61: PATH SELECTION.

I am genuinely still struggling with this fucking typescript autodocumentation program. I am not willing to just abandon it because I know it must be possible, and I am aware that trying to just write stubs manually is an awful idea that will not scale¹ well. I know it must be possible I just need to somehow achieve this in a way that is maintainable and somewhat expandable but it's just, being a fucking nightmare? I keep getting weird errors and I don't know enough about these like, go parsing/types/etc libraries to write tests or work with them super efficiently. I think I saw a package a while ago that made it work a lot closer to the reflection package, which might be a lot easier to work with.

70ish pages today.

Homestuck

We're starting out back at a path selection screen but, the only option is Dave and Jade again? I always love the panel of them standing partially outside the panel. It's just such a cool effect.

Anyway, things are a bit different this time around. John is here to derail events. He's starting to have an effect on the narrative by being in places he shouldn't be. He needs to get this under control before he fucks things up! It has however saved the mayor's life at least, which is good.

We get sent back to path selection, and while Rose and Terezi is glitchy, we have no choice but to click it.

ROSE AND TEREZI

They've split up to do nothing separately, so Rose starts monologuing. Unsure why she was paired up with Terezi and lamenting that she can't see any answers. She wonders if she should try to learn to 'play the rain' and complete her personal quest, or if it's ultimately inconsequential if she does or not. She decides to ask Kanaya about it who seems, terse. Possibly because she is purchasing litre upon litre of her fallen comrade's blood from Jane.

Terezi decides to go clown hunting, wearing a cherry red blindfold.

BACK TO PATH SELECTION

We are shunted right on back to path selection. Things are breaking down and we are treated to Aranea's treaty on leprechaun romance again, and are forced to select Dave and Jade again. Although this time all the text is small There is also a second John currently present. One tackles the other and they both appear to be somewhat, outside of the narrative for a moment. They even begin to cue up a romantic scene.

One John tells the other to stop fucking around and focus on finding Roxy.

We are treated to a rather glitchy panel of Jane, Jake and John. We're unable to read the dialog because of how jacked up everything around here is, until John does the windy thing and cleans it all up.

Remember when we first tried this dialog? We can finally read it. She plans to force Jake to marry her and give her children for her imperial dynasty. She also intends to weaponize him, using his Page of Hope powers as part of her inevitable universal conquests.

Oh and brain ghost Dirk is here. Somehow?

Elsewhere on derse. John does the windy thing into Roxy's cell. She is hidden within a fortress of Perfectly Generic Objects. She has constructed a pyramid to

ROXY: ... help focus my brain chi and spiritual majyyks and if at all possible to blitz my chakras out the yin yang

It is apparently not helping. John offers aid in learning to do the voidy thing, causing the temple of void to open. He does not have very much useful advice. He starts to explain how sburb went for him and how he ascended to godtier while Roxy pays a lot of attention. He essentially recaps the entirety of Homestuck from his perspective up to the present to her. They catch up on their mutual uh, versions of eachother's parents? And also Roxy tells John about Calliope.

ROXY: how in the loop are you on cherubs?

JOHN: oh!

JOHN: surprisingly, i know a LOT about that subject.

JOHN: for instance, did you know they turn into gigantic snakes when they have sex?

ROXY: :O

ROXY: :O

ROXY: :O

John then has the idea to give Roxy the life ring so she can resurrect Calliope.

He does the windy thing away, to get the ring. Roxy then nearly succeeds at her task and manifests a, somewhat generic matriorb.

There is a problem however.

John Egbert's ring has gone missing.

WE ARE ALL COMPLETELY BLOWN AWAY BY THIS STUNNING REVELATION.

The curtains are drawn, and this upd8 comes to a close. Thank you for reading, goodnight.